The Most Retarted Story Yet!
by RubberDuckiesWhoLikePieAndCake
Summary: This is sooooooooooooooo stupid. Kinda funny too. Please read this. DONT ASK!


Just one thing before you read this: DON"T ASK!

"Hey guys, let's go run into a brick wall!" Naruto shouted.

Naruto, Sasuke, Sakura, Gaara, Tenten, and Ino were sitting around very bored.

"You can!" Sakura said slapping him. 'baka'

"Look, over there," Naruto shouted, "there's a hamster shoplifting from an album store!"

"Huh?" Ino asked looking where Naruto had pointed, everybody did.

"He is so stupid!" Sakura pointed out.

"Thank you, Captain Obvious!" Ino shouted at her.

"So? At least I got to hug Sasuke!"

"Shut up!"

"By the way, where did that baka, Naruto go?" Sasuke asked, just tuning in to the conversation.

"Who cares?" asked Gaara.

"Maybe he ran into the brick wall." Suggested Ino pointing to a brick wall.

"Then he would be lying on the ground like the baka he is." Said Sakura.

"Or, maybe he went to go eat more ramen!" Tenten said more wisely.

"WHY DO WE CARE!" shouted Sakura at the top of her lungs.

She and the others looked up just in time to see Tenten step into the brick wall and completely disappear into a flash of aqua blue light. And she was gone.

"What! Are we in a Harry Potter movie now?" asked Ino.

"Tenten!" Sakura screamed at the brick wall, "Come back here!"

"She can't hear you, baka!" Ino sneered.

Sakura rolled her eyes and sneered back at her. And then before she could stop him, Sasuke shoved her against the brick and she disappeared into the same aqua light as Tenten before he stepped in as well.

Ino looked at Gaara. Only the two of them were left. She didn't' know a lot about him but she had heard a LOT of rumors. Terrified, Ino plunged herself into the brick. It felt cold against her skin, then a bit warm, then burning hot. Her long blonde hair stuck to the back of her neck. The aqua light flashed and shined so it hurt her eyes. Ino felt as if she was floating through a wonderland of bright light and the tiniest sound she had ever heard. Almost like bells. The sound was so beautiful that Ino was completely lost in it. Almost like a daze. Her whole body was tingling, she felt tired and struggled to stay awake. Each second seemed to be an eternity and she could think so fast it hardly mattered. Finally the bright color of the wonderland began to melt away and the sound faded until it could be heard no more. Slowly, Ino began to get her senses back and regain movement in her arms and legs.

She felt something on the back of her neck. Someone was behind her and had followed her into this place that was slowly disappearing. Where had Naruto, Tenten, Sakura, and Sasuke gone? Where they here somewhere too? Ino turned her head to look behind her. Her follower was that sand boy, Gaara.

Ino let out a scream and she felt strong but cold fingers grip her left shoulder. Suddenly, her feet met a stone floor and she fell to her knees, shivering. The fingers were still tightly clamped on her shoulder. It was as if it was sucking out all of her strength. She felt herself fall onto the stone. She landed on "her face. It was cold.

Then Ino heard a swish and something like sand. She pulled herself of the floor and looked up. It was Sasuke. Gaara was now standing before her with his sand in front of his face in order to protect him from Sasuke's kick. His hands clenched in two fists.

Gaara only grinned.

"Where the hell are we?" Naruto asked.

"Not Station nine and three-quarters!" Sakura retorted.

"Hey, you guys!" Tenten shouted, "I found a hair!"

"Ew, don't pick that up!" Sakura said.

The hair was jet black and at least ten or eleven inches long.

"Could it be Orchimaru's?" asked Ino.

"No, it's Neji's." Tenten said, "It smells like his shampoo."

"What shampoo does he use?" asked Sakura.

"Same as you and that one talking dog, why?"

Sakura looked at her feet.

"Huh?" Ino asked.

"Dido." Said Sasuke.

"It's a looonng story." She said quietly.

"How do you know what shampoo he uses?" Ino asked Tenten.

"Hinata told me." Tenten said simply.

"How does she know?" Sakura asked.

"She stalks him." Tenten said just as simply as before.

"I thought she stalked Naruto." Ino said.

"She stalks everybody."

Suddenly the floor gave away and sent the six of them falling…

RIGHT INTO NEW YORK CITY!

"What was Neji doing here?" asked Naruto, looking around

"More importantly, how do we get back?" Tenten asked.

"Let's eat something."

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All six of them were seated at a bar.

"This place is gross!" Moaned Ino.

"So, this stuff is good." Naruto slurred finishing off another shot glass.

"Let me have some!" shouted Sasuke, grabbing the bottle.

"Hand it over, punk!" Gaara said, punching Sasuke and taking the bottle.

"You're call'n me a punk?" Sasuke shouted and jumped on Gaara and the two began to punching and hitting each other on the floor.

Naruto took the chance to take the bottle back.

"Go Sasuke! Sakura yelled, "Er… I mean stop fighting your guys!"

"Give it, retard!" Ino said snatching the bottle from Naruto.

"Yo, bar tender! We'll take another of that!" Tenten said pointing to the bottle Ino was drinking.

When she got the bottle she asked, "Hey, Sakura! You want some?"

'What the heck.' She thought. "Ok."

And she took a sip after Tenten.

She felt weird. But cool too. She blinked and drank some more.

The whole night they drank more and more. They did some pretty stupid things too. Like they killed the bar tender with Gaara's sand, hijacked a random car, drove it to a TANco and killed everyone there too. Then, they went to a convenience store and stole a bunch of gum and killed everyone who tried to stop them. Which ended up being 15 cops the store clerk, the store manager, and a few National Guard members. Also a random guy on the street.

"Oh crap! That was Itachi wasn't it?" Sakura asked.

"Yup." Answered Sasuke.

"Oh, well." Tenten said.

Moving On:

They all woke up laying in the gutter of 31st street by Lexington Avenue.

"Ow, all of my joints hurt!" Ino said very groggy.

"Omigosh, like mine too." Sakura said.

"No, WAAAAAAAAAAAAYY!" Ino screamed like a fally girl.

"Ahhhhhh!" Sakura screamed too.

"You guys, we need to find a way back!" Tenten said, "Otherwise people will realize we're gone!"

"I'll show you the way back if you help me." A voice said.

They all turned around and saw Neji.

"NEJI!" Tenten yelled.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Sasuke asked.

"I go here to gamble."

"I thought the gambling capital of the world was Las Vegas in Nevada, which is four thousand miles away from New York." Said Ino.

"Wow really! Which way?" Neji asked excitedly

"You're not going anywhere until you show us how to get back." Sakura shouted.

"Fine but you have to tell me where Vegas is."

"Forget him!" Tenten sighed, "Let's try going back to where in the city we appeared and run into the closest brick wall."

"Ok, great!" Naruto shouted.

"We are going to look like retards!" Ino complained.

Place Where they appeared

"Ok here's a brick wall." Tenten pointed out.

Naruto ran up and slammed into the wall and fell to the ground like the baka he is.

"We'll at least we know that doesn't work." Ino said.

"Naruto is good for one thing only," Sakura sighed, "being a guinea pig."

Suddenly they all fell into a daydream with a bunch of pink bubbles floating around and in the middle of the scene was Daniel Radcliff in a pink ballerina tutu. He was also dancing as he waved a fake plastic wand.

"Huh?" Ino asked.

"Somebody poke my eyes out!" Gaara shouted.

"We can't, they're too covered in eyeliner!" Sakura shouted at him.

"It's not eyeliner!" Gaara yelled.

"Sure!"

"Arguing in bad, children!" Daniel Radcliff sang.

"F you!" Sasuke yelled.

Daniel waved his plastic wand at them and in a mist of sparkles they found themselves falling through the same sensation as before. At the end there was water falling softly and smoothly as if it were glass. First Tenten went through it, then Sakura and Ino together, followed by Sasuke and then the always last, Gaara.

Once they were all back Ino asked "hey, what about Neji?"

"F him too!" Sasuke yelled.

THE END

Thanks 4 reading this, like I said before, DON"T ASK!


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